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Wednesday, October 5, 2011

"Don't Make Me Count to Three!" Giveaway

If you have been in Christian parenting circles, you have probably heard about Tedd Tripp's books Shepherding a Child's Heart  and Instructing a Child's Heart.  I highly recommend both books (and reviewed IaCH here.) because they really help a parent to understand the need for biblical discipline to be focused on the heart NOT the outward behavior.

Tedd Tripp's books were really good...they definitely made me think.  BUT for this momma, neither book really gave me the examples I needed to really be able to implement heart-oriented discipline for my young children.   In their defense, that was not the purpose of either book.  Ginger Plowman answered that concern in "Don't Make Me Count to Three!": A Mom's Look at Heart-Oriented Discipline.

If you find that you count misbehavior and are put off by the title of this book, "Don't Make Me Count to Three!", let me encourage you to still read it.  The idea is that the statement "Don't make me count to three!" and many other similar statements have the parent avoiding discipline, she doesn't say that that counting behavior is wrong.  But threats...not effective. 

Don't Make Me Count to Three!Honestly, I thought this book was exactly what I needed!  Ginger Plowman's book reads very quickly, yet filled with what I needed to read to better understand disciplining in better way that would honor God.
" It is my calling, my priority, my struggle, and my goal.  
I will rise to the occasion and accept the task at hand.
  I will love, nurture, and train my children the way that 
God has called me to do." ~ page 21

Plowman really helped me, through examples and discussion, to better understand (oh, not perfectly!) how to get to the cause of the behavior.  You know, the heart of the matter.

One thing that I have been able to somewhat easily implement (though, oh, I need some more work in this) is to have my children (especially my daughter who is nearly 5, though a bit harder with nearly 3 son) go back and do the correct thing...you know, show love, obey, use a different tone...I help them with the words if they don't know it.  Then they do it.  You know...like role play or practice so that the next time they might make a better choice.

Throughout the book examples of dialogue...and even mistakes parents can make...are shared in a way that parents can utilize.  

Despite the controversy of spanking, I appreciated Plowman's distinction between childish behavior and foolish behavior.  She explains that childish behavior becomes foolishness when a child understands the clear instructions that have been given, and yet still chooses to disobey.  In her opinion, and I personally agree, direct disobedience and defiant attitudes need to be disciplined.  And she would say that the "rod" (spanking) is the means of this discipline.  She then gives many thought-out guidelines for biblical chastisement.  Oh, this is hard!    I've heard some of them before, but seeing them all together was very good for me.   

My overall thoughts on "Don't Make Me Count to Three!" are very positive.  I highly recommend it, and quite honestly, I think it is a book I need to revisit at least once a year for the next many years.  Ginger Plowman suggests that we are not to control our children's behavior, but to understand their hearts.  As we discipline them, their hearts can change...and eventually there will be outward changes in their behavior, too.

Tough stuff, huh?  Well, parenting is not for wimps.  (And I mean all of it, not just discipline...it truly is tough stuff...I began saying that after our first life-threatening situation with our children.)

GIVEAWAY (Be sure to check out all of our giveaways this week!!  There are more!)
Shepherd Press provided "Don't Make Me Count to Three!" AND they want to provide one Live, Learn, Love reader (who resides in the US) with a copy, too!  


  • To enter, just leave a comment below!  Be sure that I have a way to contact you through email.
  • Giveaway will run through Tuesday, October 11th.
Extra Entries~ Leave a separate comment for each!


  • Follow LLL through Facebook or Google Friends Connect.
  • Share about this (or any of this week's) giveaways through Facebook, Twitter...
  • Visit Shepherd Press and tell me another book you'd love to have for yourself.
Winner is #12, Mozi Esme!  Congratulations!

16 comments:

Ticia said...

Oh pick me! me, me, me........

Ticia said...

I follow you

Bluerose said...

I've had my eye on this one for awhile! This is one I will most likely buy in the next year or so. I'm guessing Grasshopper has a little ways to go before this would be the most beneficial.

bluerosesheart at yahoo dot com

Bluerose said...

I follow.

Bluerose said...

I went to Shepherd Press and I now have two more books on my "read one day" list. Get Wisdom and Everyday Talk. (and those are besides the ones you mentioned). I couldn't decide which one of those to put at #1, though.

Shonya said...

OK, I've heard so much about this book, I think I really need to read it, so sign me up! :)

Shonya said...

I subscribed on FB, thanks! :)

Shonda said...

I would love this book. shondaet@gmail.com

Shonda said...

I follow LLL. shondaet@gmail.com

Shonda said...

I would like to read Everyday Talk. shondaet@gmail.com

Shonda said...

I shared on FB. shondaet@gmail.com

Mozi Esmé said...

Sounds like an interesting read! I keep going around on my thoughts on discipline and could use some more ideas... :) And I DO count - but specifically as transition time rather than discipline avoidance - or so I tell myself.

Linda Kish said...

Where was this book when I needed it? Not written yet, of course. Well, at least it is here for my DIL to use. Count me in, please.

lkish77123 at gmail dot com

Anne@LittleSproutBooks said...

looks like fantastic food for thought - would love to read it!

Anne@LittleSproutBooks said...

Went to see you on FB but don't see a "like" button on your page?

Anne@LittleSproutBooks said...

shared on twitter:
http://twitter.com/#!/SproutBooks/status/123295960083333120

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